innerfictions

Saturday, 9 April 2011

ghosts...

I like feeling alive - I like feeling I have a purpose - - - - that I'm happy to live, and grow old - - - after a life time of looking backwards. Of constructing memories, and meanings. And then - - - seeking escape into emptiness. Becoming one with nothingness.

It's all bound up in a sense of belonging. I don't know if I've really felt this before - I've had intimations, but now. It has solidity - no longer a dream - an insipid wraithlike existence ...

But then, maybe all that inwardness was necessary before looking outwards - to find form - to connect with another... maybe it was just time.

And it needed another.

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